What’s Eating Gilbert
There’s an old adage – boys will be boys. There’s another old adage – we are products of our environment.
Take for example a recent incident in Gilbert, Arizona. A local parent reported that her son’s yearbook contained bomb threats, one signed by a boy named David and the other by an Iraqi-American boy named Mustafa Abdul Razzaq. After the parent notified authorities, the school was evacuated and the Gilbert police telephoned the Razzaq residence to determine if Mustafa was there, which he was. It being a half day, he had decided not to attend.
In reality, what had occurred was that the comment in the yearbook in question was never written, nor signed, by Mustafa. It had been penned by two other boys who later admitted to it and were taken into custody. The threat was, of course, not real, and the two youths, one 13 and one 14, had charges filed against them.
From the local paper, The Tribune…
“Mustafa, his mother and police discussed the incident in interviews with the Tribune.
The teen and his family call it a religious bias incident that was one of many over the years that have targeted the boy because he is a Muslim. Police say it was just a prank that had unfortunate consequences.”
[…]
“Since the deadly attacks of Sept. 11, 2001, they say this is just one of many times that Mustafa’s classmates have labeled him a terrorist. He says kids have told him to “go hijack a plane and run into a building” verbally and on notes they’ve left on his desk.
Sometimes he’d retaliate and get suspended. Sometimes, he’d ignore them.
But because the whole school was evacuated last week, he’s afraid to return there. He says he’s been getting phone calls and text messages from kids asking if he is guilty even though he’s been cleared by police.
Mustafa is upset with the school.
“Some of the teachers in the junior high don’t care,” Mustafa says of the discriminatory teasing he’s endured. “They don’t want to get into this kind of stuff. That’s why I don’t like Mesquite Junior High School that much.”
Mohammed AbuHannoud, the civil rights director for the Arizona chapter of the Council on American-Islamic Relations, says his organization hears these types of complaints all the time.
“I think Mustafa is an example of what’s going on here after Sept. 11 with a lot of Muslim families,” AbuHannoud says. “I get so many calls, for example, from other parents and they complain, ‘My son is called Saddam, or a classmate called my son Hussein or Saddam Hussein.’ The schools do not do anything serious against that.”
Gilbert police spokesman Sgt. Andrew Duncan says the department is “sympathetic to the serious psychological effects of bias-motivated crimes,” but in this instance, police found the two students meant it as a joke.
Even so, the department took the hoax seriously and submitted juvenile referrals for each boy on charges of interfering with an educational institution, threatening and intimidating, and threatening to damage the school.
On Wednesday night, no one answered the phone at the home of the boy who wrote about Mustafa in the yearbook.
Dianne Bowers, a spokeswoman for the Gilbert Unified School District, says Mustafa’s mother had not contacted the school to report race- or religion-related bias incidents.
However, Bowers tried to address these concerns Wednesday by arranging an appointment for Abdulghafoor to meet with the school’s diversity officer. She also said the school strives to promote tolerance through its Character Counts program, which encourages trustworthiness, respect, responsibility, fairness and citizenship.
Abdulghafoor says she has been in touch with school officials and is disappointed with the lack of response.
She said the first religious bias incident occurred in 2001. Mustafa was in second grade, and one day, her husband got a call from FBI agents. They told him the school had called the bureau after a teacher overheard Mustafa call himself Osama bin Laden. Later, his mother said he told them that kids at school had been calling him by the terrorist’s name.
The FBI could not immediately verify the 2001 incident, but the bureau’s Arizona spokeswoman, Deborah Mc-Carley, says the family’s story sounds plausible. After Sept. 11, any complaints referring to terrorism had to be assessed and taken seriously.
Another incident occurred last year, Mustafa says. He was made fun of when he came to school dressed in traditional Saudi Arabian garb for a class assignment - each student was to come to school representing a different country.
“They tell him again, ‘You are Osama bin Laden,” his mother remembered. “You are a terrorist. Your mom is a terrorist. Your dad is a terrorist. You have to go back to your country.”
His mother learned of the incident after a teacher called the family’s home to report it.”
…“but in this instance, police found the two students meant it as a joke.” Boys will be boys, after all. Not only that…“On Wednesday night, no one answered the phone at the home of the boy who wrote about Mustafa in the yearbook”…we are products of our environment.
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June 5th, 2007 at 2:00 pm
I am rather disgusted by all this. I just don’t know what to think or say about such incidents any more. And it’s really sad when adults don’t do enough when dealing with these issues.
June 5th, 2007 at 2:13 pm
It’s really horrible that schoolyard bullying has been going on for years and still, things are the same as they were 50 years ago. I was always picked on too in elementary school and I remember my principal telling me to get over it because I will always have to work with people I don’t like, that sure didn’t stop the bullying. It’s also terrible that parents don’t want, or even care to acknowledge that their kids could be involved in that stuff. An incident just happened here where about 20 kids beat up one kid at an elementary school. It’s sickening and it definitely has me worried about what it’ll be like for my kids to go to school.
June 5th, 2007 at 2:42 pm
I have nothing but sympathy for this poor young man. I would hope nothing like this would ever happen at the school where I teach, but it wouldn’t surprise me if it did. People wonder why I am so troubled with the idea of bringing children into this world. If they could see what I see or hear what I hear from teenagers on a daily basis, maybe they would understand. I love children (obviously, I’m a teacher), but it’s so hard for me to think that my kids would be safe and happy in today’s society of racists, druggies and bullies. It’s not just paranoia.
I do, however, have students that are wonderful individuals and I have told them if I knew my children would be like them, I would have no qualms about having 2 of my own. But I’m afraid of what my potential kids would be exposed to after leaving a loving home each day. People say if you raise your children properly, they will be able to manage on their own and be successful. I’m just not convinced. Why? Because the apple doesn’t fall far from the tree, and Matt makes a very good point about the power of good parenting. Maybe I shouldn’t be so worried after all….
June 5th, 2007 at 3:25 pm
The sad thing is that this happens everywhere now, all the time. My boyfriend has two room mates from Iran and he calls them terrorists, as a joke and they don’t mind, but it happens everywhere where it is not a joke. And I don’t agree with it even if people are joking, but I can’t do anything about my boyfriend if his friends don’t mind it.
It’s just disgusting how people react to things like this.
June 5th, 2007 at 4:46 pm
“gyp” …I was “jewed” is also one. Again, meaning Jews rip everyone off. When we were kids the rhyme “eeenie Meenie minie moe catch a tiger by the toe…. was catch a nigger by the toe …no-one even gave it any thought until we were old enough to know what the heck it ment….
June 5th, 2007 at 5:11 pm
The meat of this is, yes, it starts at home.
That can be applied to a lot of things but this case it’s a positive.
It spans a varitey of things, temperment, domestic violence, substance abuse…but if you start with them young they’ll be able to tell the difference.
Look at what they’re able to cope with now?
June 5th, 2007 at 7:04 pm
happypringle brings up a really interesting point.
“My boyfriend has two room mates from Iran and he calls them terrorists, as a joke and they don’t mind, but it happens everywhere where it is not a joke…but I can’t do anything about my boyfriend if his friends don’t mind it.”
How far is too far? Example, I have a friend who lovingly refers to me as “Chief”. Oddly I’m ok with that (even though “Chief” is a well respected title and really shouldn’t be used as a joke) but it’s when I was refered to as “Squaw” that I completely lost it! My automatic reaction was a swift kick in this shin to the person who said it. Another question, how can we truly know if people don’t mind it? Some people don’t want to make a stink and seem like they’re not being a “team player.” That may end up hurting them more in the end.
“Sometimes he’d retaliate and get suspended. Sometimes, he’d ignore them.” Sometimes ignoring things for too long can leave you empty.
June 5th, 2007 at 8:34 pm
“Sometimes he’d retaliate and get suspended. Sometimes, he’d ignore them.”
I’m all for violent retaliation… some people just need to have their asses kicked. Don’t get me wrong, I’m all for peace and non-violence, but sometimes you just have to look the other fella in the eye and tell him to fuck himself. Sometimes there’s no substitute for a good ass whooping.
June 5th, 2007 at 9:31 pm
My experience with the school system is that they can be very lax and don’t get involved because it requires extra effort on their part.
My son was bullied in school and the administration took the same stance….”boys will be boys”. When the bullying escalated from verbal to physical, I demanded that they intervene. One day I’d marched into the principal’s office and reported another in a long string of incidents to her. Her reaction was one that I was tiring of…..”we like to let them sort this stuff out by themselves”. To which I finally lost it and replied, “what the fuck do we need you for then?”. I gave up on the school as an ally at that point.
I know I’ve totally missed the point of your entry - but it kind of ties in with all kids that are singled out and bullied. They remain unheard and it shouldn’t be. Kids can be cruel but it’s up to the adults to set the standards. Targeting someone because they’re “different” is nothing new…it’s just disheartening that it’s still allowed to happen in this day and age.
The kids very well might’ve been directing this stuff at the boy “as a joke” and to be “cool” (show offs) - it’s what kids do. But it’s up to the adults in their lives to send a clear message that it’s not acceptable and that’s not happening with them downplaying things. They’re basically saying it’s not a big deal and that’s where the problem lies.
The sad part - there are many adults who display this type of behavior and it’s accepted in society so how can we expect kids to act any differently? My Dad is a simple man - no frills or extras. As a golfer, he often just wore casual clothing and his boots to the course (no fancy golf wear) - he was, afterall, there to golf, not to make a fashion statement. He looked neat/tidy and golfed better than most. But, unfortunately, some of the men took to “snickering” about his attire and making comments behind his back, but loud enough for him to hear. It hurt him, but he let his game do the talking. Sad….that these “so called” men had a lot of growing up to do. I felt so disheartened when he told me of why he was considering quitting his course….we’re talking about men in the 45-70 age group. So is it any wonder that some youth think it’s funny to act like jackasses in a malicious, hurtful manner? They’re probably being taught their life lessons by clowns like these.
June 6th, 2007 at 7:59 am
There’s no doubt about it….it does start at home….
I’ll even go as far as to blame the Parents for the Ignorance their Children display…
Our only Chance for a better Future is to teach our Children right…
P.S.: I don’t know how many times I’ve heard the ever popular…
“Sandnigger”….
June 6th, 2007 at 8:15 am
This really annoys me. There is a huge double standard going on here that goes on daily in the public school system and it drives me nuts. I work for a school district and have worked in schools where kids bully others and have had my own children experience it. Some people blame the ones being bullied, others just try to ignore it, hoping it will go away. No one wants to do anything about it because they are afraid of something. Drives me nuts.
I don’t really have an answer but there has to be some action. For instance in my workplace coworkers routinely used derogatory remarks against other cultures justifying..”they are just words”, horrible nasty words that were created to take power away from others and they dropped them at coffee break like there was no problem. How long this has gone on I have no idea but one day I just had to say, this is rude, wrong and it needs to stop. It took about another 8 months and finally the last time it happened I again voiced my frustration and left the room. I stopped taking coffee break with my coworkers and instead use the time to walk outside. Did it change the world? No but hopefully it will make one of them think twice before dropping the “N” bomb because it is “just a word”
Peace!
June 6th, 2007 at 9:51 am
My sister just had a kid, and she worries about him growing up in an area where she is the only person who “looks brown” as they say. She has been asked questions like, “Why are all of you terrorists?” and “Why do you hate America” just because of how she looks. She worries for her son, that he will have to deal with this kind of discrimination. Robert A. Williams, Jr. wrote a book called Like a Loaded Weapon
in which he discusses the history of racism in America, and in several sections specifically discusses the racism within language. It is a worthwhile read for anyone who is interested in seeing how there are symbols of racism all around us that we tend not to even notice because they have become so ingrained in our culture.
June 6th, 2007 at 10:20 am
school’s a shark’s pool
June 6th, 2007 at 10:49 am
Deb. I am teacher at a private school in BC. I have had three students in my class not invited back next year despite their parents begging me. Two of the culprits are chronic verbal bullies. Our school’s policy is if there is enough documentation (ie Behaviour reports) we can have them removed for the following year. Problem with our school is that sometimes there isn’t follow through and the parents somehow manage to convince administration to get their child back in. That creates another problem of low teacher moral due to lack of student accountability and lack of administative support. It all depend on how much time a teacher is willing to spent trying to thwart this unacceptable social behaviour.
June 6th, 2007 at 11:50 am
For the last four years I have question the character and decision making of my two brothers baseball coach. It wasn’t until this year that I realized the value of this behavior. Although I still disagree with his tactics and am 100% disgusted with his manipulation and untruthyness shall I say, I believe that it has also helped my brothers learn that sometimes situations unfair and that everybody doesn’t play nice.
I wonder what difficulties I would have as an adult if I did not learn as a child that sometimes its just unfair. And that I will feel the effects of prejudice whether it’s that I am unmistakably German, or that I am a woman or whatever else someone can come up with to view me as unfit. As much as I want to protect them from themselves and from their insane girlfriends my mother is the one to help me let them make their own mistakes.
Ultimately as children if we can’t experience some of the semi-tolerable bad things in life while still under the protection of our families can we have true empathy for the big problems in life when things are just unfair. Can we even recognize it? Is there after all social learning taking place when being bullied?
What those children did was wrong, hopefully they learned from it but think of the big lessons they might have learned from it. I also wonder would I be as passionate about some of the “big” causes I work for if I had never experienced some of the “little” pains of childhood.
June 6th, 2007 at 2:25 pm
Lots of good dialogue here,
I will check out Like a Loaded Weapon, xarcadia, it sounds like just what I am looking for.
Yes some of the small things help us deal as adults but those bullies grow up to be big bullies and I for one am sick of dealing with them. Plus I am sad and weary from hearing about children who take their own life because they were bullied.
June 7th, 2007 at 8:34 am
I had not heard anything about it, but it’s not surprising. Disgusting, but not surprising.
Unfortunately most of the time ignorance breeds ignorance.