I have struggled of late to pen something in-depth for the site. I do my usual daily reading, but I feel exhausted with regards to providing commentary. Over the weekend I did write a piece for a local publication called ‘Street Corner’, though I’m not sure when it will appear. I have, of course, written about this subject before, so some of what I wrote on the weekend may not seem new to avid readers of the site, but I thought that I would post it anyway.
A five Minute Car Ride Apart
It’s an odd thing to walk out of one’s front door and realize that the reason that you’re not amongst those huddled in doorways or wandering the streets in the morning mist is because you can afford medication for the illness from which you suffer. I walk my two dogs down Cordova to the corner at Carrall each morning and quite often engage in brief conversations with those waiting outside of the methadone clinic, most of them overjoyed to play with the dogs and share in a few seconds of polite conversation before I continue on to the coffee shop around the corner. It is never lost on me that the similarities between us are greater than our dissimilarities. In truth, that is a universal principle here on the Lower Eastside, despite the fact that many Vancouverites believe that that isn’t the case.
It takes a blow to understand the ramifications of one. The Lower Eastside is a veritable living museum of victims of blows, in most cases far more than one. In my life I have had to deal with my fair share (as have we all), the most severe of which, for me, is the mental illness from which I suffer, one that is shared by a variety of individuals that call the streets beyond my front gate home. In their case, unlike that of my own, they haven’t the realistic ability to have their conditions properly addressed, their demons tempered, the darkness of their thoughts poured over by $300 dollar an hour psychologists or, for that mater, even psychiatrists that work within the system itself. There are, of course, outreach and counseling initiatives that exist down here, but they remain massively under funded, their volunteers and permanent staff taxed to the limit.
We are, all of us, more alike than not, despite the fact that many in this city would disagree when it comes to comparing themselves to those that inhabit this neighbourhood. I have always found it bizarre that humanity is so easily overlooked, but I am never surprised by it. To see others, those we think beneath us, as equals, is not something that most are willing to do on a routine basis. Perhaps that is why those who drive down Hastings on their way to and from work lock their doors if they happen to get caught at the lights. Not because they are afraid of what is beyond their windows, but because they are afraid of what is presented in the reflection of their rearview.
No matter views to the contrary, the civility and compassion of every society on this earth is measured by how it confronts the worst of its problems: poverty, the care for its elderly, the displaced, the mentally distraught, the abused and shattered. Vancouver’s Lower Eastside remains a testament to this city’s ever evolving arrogance and incivility, one that is not merely nationally known, but internationally.
Every morning I walk out of my front door and I see people. And beyond the slum hotels and the tenements that clutter this neighbourhood, Vancouverites run the Seawall and play with their dogs in parks oblivious to the overwhelming difference between what are, in truth, two worlds – a five minute car ride apart.
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Still wonder how people can turn a blind eye to this situation.
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Little do the people know the dream life for which they work so hard to maintain can vanish in the blink of an eye, leaving them to make the five-minute pilgrimage into the world they thought they would only ever see from the outside.
A lot of unfortunate homeowners are to have their abodes repossessed very soon. Merry Christmas indeed.
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and what can be done?
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I just read this great short story, The Machine Stops, by E.M. Forster…written in 1909…pretty spooky stuff about the advancement of civilization.
Nicely pointed out Matthew.
Very real realities that people often don’t want to look at, even when it is in their own backyard.
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Your first paragraph has some information in it that was completely unknown to me. The main thing that has surprised me about your commentary on the Lower Eastside is how you say that the similarities are greater than the dissimilarities. I have grown up in the praries all my life (Prince Albert, and Saskatoon), and here we are told a completely different story about the “slums” of Vancouver. I even remember some of the class discussions that we had in highschool about this topic. Every time the teacher would tell us about, or show us a video of policemen down there walking the streets, they would portray an image of a different world. To this day I can remember a policeman talking directly into the camera and saying how it was a “different world.”
Although these videos were continually shown to us as highschool students. I must defend the position of the law enforcement officers that were always being followed. They never made it seem like an episode of Cops, where there were crazy lunatics running around pillaging the streets. Instead, the videos were frame after frame of hope. The men and women that were walking the beat of the Lower Eastside were showing the optimism that they had for the people in the doorways, and on the streets.
Overall, these lessons painted a different picture than the one that you have described. The version that is taught out here in the praries is one of the “two worlds.” We are not shown the side that you are speaking of. Instead, the false images are being perpetuated by the insitutions that are suppsoed to be educating and enlightening us.
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dude.. let me read this when im sober…. sober or not.. matt, you use too big of words for me to understand… fukkk lol….. im not that smart!!!!!!! :) hehehe
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theres always two different sides to a story…..my head almost explodes when i try to think of both of them… u can think and think and think but you’ll never figure it out….
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Living in New Jersey right now, I can see this on a much larger scale. The average income for a male in the town I live in, Summit, is $86,000. And yet a 10 minute train ride towards NYC and you’re in East Orange / Newark - two of the poorest, and therefore most dangerous cities in the country. Head 10 minutes in the other direction and you’ve got multi-million dollar homes on every street. Really makes me question The American Dream…
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The presumption of inequality and subsequent judgment of our fellow people has and continues to be the darkest part of humankind. I live in a neighborhood that has a reputation for being crime ridden and dangerous. I chose to live here to do my part in making it a better place.
A few nights ago a stranger knocked on my door. It was dark and cold and I was not exactly comfortable at first when answering the door. In fact, truthfully, I probably wouldn’t have if I did not have my loud large dogs voicing alarm.
The stranger was apologetic for disturbing me but he did not waste time in asking for food for his 2 kids in exchange for shoveling my walkway.
When telling a friend the next day of the man’s misfortune, not only did she immediately voice her doubt that the man even had kids but that I was foolish to give him all the things I did.
It was her immediate reaction that shocked me the most about the whole encounter.
What kind of person would deny food to the possibility of a hungry human being, whether or not they had kids? (though I truly believe he did, from a general feeling and the fact that when I apologized to him that the peanut butter I gave him was already opened, he got so excited because his kids love peanut butter and he told me I was making their day)
It was my friend’s reaction that I find most discouraging, and revealing about the state of society. This man, a stranger to me but a neighbor also, came to my door looking for a helping hand and he even offered to work in return for it. My friend, who never has to worry for her next meal, passed judgment upon him for his misfortune. There was no pause between my words and her immediate ruling.
It’s like a filthy habit for some people, I think. To believe they are more important than another being. To never pause and consider the hardships another person has endured to put them in the position they may be in, and to look at the person as a simple pest instead of the complex survivor they truly are.
It’s easier to judge than understand, I guess.
It’s easier to deny that we are all one or two steps away from being the judged instead of the jury.
The stranger thanked me, from the bottom of his heart.
That is deep and sincere gratitude, something so many people in today’s world seriously lack.
(Thanks for the post Matt, it gave me an opportunity to re-examine and appreciate the lesson I thought I had already learned)
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Having lost my medication coverage I’ll find out just how fucked the system is sooner or later when I run out of money to by more… There are many problems with the system, perhaps one day we will learn just how much alike we all are.
The sad reality is that the well to do rarely care, most people rarely care provided they can surround their local world with what they think is good and ignore anything outside. It is too bad.. but it remains a problem that people will not understand unless forced to deal with themselves. Forced to not understand by their unbelievable arrogance that they are truly above it all… perhaps one day.
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This morning I walked out of McDonalds with my kid, chatting away to him. I saw a guy in a car laughing at something behind me..I turned and noticed a homeless person walking away from me. I didn’t even know he was behind me talking to me.. I gather he gestured something behind my back and the guy in the car laughed at it. I had no idea that the person was asking me something… Then the guys stared at me as I slowly walked with my head down to my car… I hated that I never heard him… And am so mad I never went back and asked what he said to me.. I was embarrassed for being a dumb ass and not hearing him or knowing he needed something…
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Matt - your observation is one that always makes me think twice. Thanks
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Quoting Daedalus:
Unfortunately for the oblivious it is nothing more than a dog eat dog world and it is all about the personal gain. I am wondering who these people think are going to take care of the ones who need it the most? They ignore it because they are healthy and have much good fortune. Not such great fortune for many others living this way. I am just wondering why life has to be so unkind.
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Quoting Steve Desmond:
Yup, it’s like that here on Long Island too. Most of my friends and myself included have moved out of here because it is just too expensive to live anywhere, even in the poorest of towns. I really don’t know how people do it.
Matt being a writer myself I must say it’s a pleasure to read all of your articles that you post.
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Matt: Great piece. The world would be better off if there were tons more people like you who are willing to
contribute to the awareness of what is going on down there. I have never seen anything so utterly disturbing when I made my way down to Van last. Just the complete disregard for human suffering.
ZitaDawn: That is one of the saddest things I have ever heard. I got shivers.
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Very eloquently written. It’s so sad that so many people do not want to see the world for what it is, want to only live in their little world -oblivious to the ones worse off than them. I think this piece will open some eyes, especially at Christmas time when people tend to be so materialistic.
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Let me comment from another view… Most or all of those people on the streets of East Van once enjoyed a warm bed and the life most of us take for granted. Most had a mother that held them just as we hold our own children and pray nothing will happen to them. Most or some of them suffer from mental illness, and at some point in their lives were unable to function socially in society so they were ridiculed, and damaged enough, without getting the help that they needed (funding and medical) for medication, therapy, and support. Turning to drugs to self medicate to “tame the dragons”… to make each day a little easier. The next thing they know they are out there. Be that East Van or New York. It could happen to anyone… maybe even one of us reading this tonight. It could happen to our children, lets think about that. My daughter has autism and I as a mother, do everything I can do to get her the help she needs. Occupational therapy, behavior therapy, art therapy, music therapy, dance, doctors like you wouldn’t believe… we are in Children’s Hospital once a month. Trying to get this under control… to give her anything I can so that she will have the skills to be accepted socially, and able to live independently when she becomes an adult. If this problem isn’t addressed with youth now - the rate of street people will increase with the increase of mental illnesses and disabilities of families that can not afford the support and intervention that is needed now.
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OH Sweet Jesus, Kara you’re making me cry…. I am proud to say that I KNOW you personally. Your kids are the luckiest kids in the world……….Their mom rocks!!!!!! Now get over here!!!!! It’s been too long.
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I interact on a daily basis with a couple of drug addicts who panhandle outside my place of work. I’ve “befriended” them and, when they see that my boss isn’t around, they ask to use my phone or to exchange bills for their pocket of change (that they’ve panhandled for). They know the drill with me - don’t use the phone to call your dealer, etc. Usually it’s a ride they’re after. Probably to their dealers place.
One girl, “N”, has very low self esteem. Crack & heroin are her drugs of choice and she’s really wanting to get clean. I think she became endeared to me when I shared the story of my brother with her - he’d been battling a serious drug addiction for years and has nearly two years clean in NA. I “connected” with her at this point and seemed to gain her trust. I told her I understood. I do. My brother’s battle was a long one that he managed to hide from us for years. But one day, like a hammer over the head, reality hit us and we were in the throws of the ugliest of the ugly. He was dying and pulling us down with him. I knew that this life wasn’t pretty, nor was it one that anyone would “choose”, as some seem to think. Sure, to use drugs is. But to be in a place where they replace something that’s lacking or numb something really isn’t by choice. It just sort of happens that way and is much deeper than just “using drugs”. No one wants to be a junkie.
Anyhow, one day I noticed that “N” looked much better than she recently had and I told her that. She whispered to me that she was “trying” and that she was going to pick up her methadone. I saw a spark in her eye and realized that noone probably had ever told her that she looked good. She almost bounced out of the building. Most of the locals think she’s a big pain in the ass and treat her very poorly - scowling at her and chasing her away. And, believe me, she gets nasty back…she can be quite scary. But what they don’t know is that underneath her scruffy, hardened appearance is a very vulnerable, sweet woman. She calls me “sweetie” and is more polite and courteous than half my customers.
She wavers back and forth between relapses and the battle to be clean. I can always tell when she’s losing the battle…she has sores on her face and is as jittery as can be. And she usually rushes right past with her hood up when she’s “struggling”. She is a human being under that hood, capable of feeling embarrassment and humiliation just like the rest of us are. She probably feels it tenfold. And I pull for her everyday.
I just wanted to share that. Because if we look around there are people everywhere who could use a few kind words. Will it “fix” things? No. But you’d be surprised at the impact that they could have.
Thanks Matt. This city needs you. And you made me think of N….I haven’t seen her in a week or so.
Oh, and I just wondered if you’ve read about the huge “battle” going on here (Richmond) in response to a proposed “Turning Point” recovery house? People in the neighborhood have started a NIMBY group (”Not In My Back Yard”) and “fear” the “type” of people it will “attract” into the area. I recently wrote an editorial addressing these people and in support of the facility, as it’s obvious that it’s better to have people in “recovery” than it is to have them using out on the street. They seem to feel that they can chase away the problem if they chase away the building and don’t seem open to the idea that it is a GOOD thing to have programs that help people. So sad.
Sorry for the long comment. You’ve hit my soft spot.
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i dont know why i find this destitute stretch of wasteland in my backyard so appealing, maybe its because i read “on the road” by jack kerouac and now i feel in love with this whole idea of slums and wandering the streets. and i have worked as a volunteer at a local outreach program, i have seen how horrible the conditions down there are, but i can’t look away, maybe its just my bourgeoisie bohemian style of thinking.
hey Matt, are you the surprise guest for the santafox ball on december 13??
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I remember hearing a few years ago of a homeless person in Vancouver who fell asleep on a bench right infront of a starbucks where he subsiquently caught his blanket/clothes on fire. Even though he smoldered and smoked, people just kept coming and going with their ‘double no-fat grande lattes’; An awful lot of people outright ignored the situation. Nobody stopped to help or even wake him up, yet he was on fire. In essence, that is what you see happening in grand scale on Vancouver’s eastside, as in many other places in the province.
Recently, in Kelowna, a small group of cowards have taken to using fire-extinguishers on sleeping homeless people, despite the fact that they have NOT been on fire, (a bit of irony i suppose.)
Here, in the province’s capital, the homeless numbers have swelled in recent years to 1500, Meanwhile, massive condo projects are selling status and style at a half-million per 600 square feet. And, at an unpresidented rate too. There is something sad and wrong about all of this.
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Reminds me of a suburb around Detroit. One street litterally divides the rich houses from the complete slums and it always floored me everytime we drove by — one street made the difference between absolute poverty and excessive riches, it’s unbelievable.
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I have a bit of an affinityfor the DTES and the people who live there. Some of them are people I know, or that I went to school with. I have battled my own demons with addiction and depression and wonder what kept me safe, how I am I different from them, why am I not down there……nothing can be father from the truth when someones says ‘oh they are just a bunch of junkies, who cares.’ ‘They’ are someones mother, father, sister, or brother, another human being just like you and I, who has every right as you and I. My father was a ‘junkie’ or ‘addict’ who had severe bipoloar2 disorder and succumbed to his addiction in 2004. Was he any different from someone from the DTES? Other than demographically, he really wasn’t, but society would disagree. Matt summed it up perfectly.
Not because they are afraid of what is beyond their windows, but because they are afraid of what is presented in the reflection of their rearview.
thank you.
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Have only had time to read Matt’s, Kara, Deb and Zita Dawn’s postings tonite….
Deb you are amazing soul.
Zita I don’t think the shivers I’m feeling are because I’m cold right now.
Kara, you’re my hero, I can’t believe we lost touch for 18 years.. NEVER AGAIN.
Matt the “A 5 minute car ride apart” title just gives me chills…. I don’t know how you pick the titles, but that is what really hits me where it hurts. I drove through your part of town the other day and in 20 seconds I was at the Marine building… two different worlds….
Lenny Kravitz once (or twice) said:
“One planet
One people
One colour,
I don’t know what the problem is”
I think of that statement in many different contexts….
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It is nice to know that while so many find it easy to turn their backs on another human being, that there are so many of us who don’t see things that way. I work in a customer service job (oh shit, it’s just Pizza Hut people), and have 3 guys that come in to see me whenever I work, as the kids that work with me regularly (4 of them) and I are the only ones on our block willing to keep them fed. Keep in mind, my restaurant is in a shopping center that has 6 other food places. Everyone else just treats them as a problem, which really pisses me off, because all 3 guys are super nice. Which brings me to a story of something that happened just last night.
There is one guy in particular who comes in the most often. As I have been splitting my time between 2 restaurants (welcome to restaurant management), I had not seen him in the last few weeks. My friend Susie (she works there too) and I had been discussing the fact that we had not seen him lately, and we hoped he was okay. He is just that nice. Whenever he comes in, he will always wait until we are done helping customers, is always super polite, and always says thanks whether I have anything to give him or not. So last night, he shows up around 10pm, so I went out to talk to him after I told Barbara to make him a pizza. So we talked for a few minutes, told me he had been in, I just missed him ’cause he showed up when I was off or at the other restaurant. So Barbara came out to say hello as well, and I told him his food would be ready in 10 minutes. BTW, he does share this food with at least 4 other guys. So he says, “Ok, I’ll be right back. I have something for you.”, then takes off across the street. Barbara kind of looks at me, and I just shrug my shoulders. So 10 minutes later, he is back for his food, and he hands me this plastic bag and says, “I just wanted you to know that I appreciate your time and friendship. No one has ever been as nice to me as you are”, then he takes off. Of course, Barbara is like “OPEN IT!!” So I did….and started crying.
This man, who has nothing, who has no bed to sleep in, no one to take care of him, and relies on the graces of other people just to survive, had brought me a Christmas gift. It was a candle shaped like a Christmas tree, and a coffee cup with Santa on it. I know he got it from one of the dollar stores in the center I work in, but that is NOT the point. The point is that this man who has nothing gave someone who wanted nothing in return a wonderful gift.
It is the best Christmas present I have ever received, and probably ever will……
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rabbit, holy crap, that made me cry. Awesome. Best Christmas story ever.
(and thanks Tanya. Right back at ya babe)
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when i was in quebec city after matthew’s show i walked back to my 20$ room and there was this man between walls,sitting on the ground.he reached for my hand so i grabbed it.
we talked a bit and it was freezing.so i asked;what are you going to do this winter?
holding the 2$ i just gave him he awnsered;well now im going to by a burger.
cause what else would you think of when youre starving and cold.seemed like a nice man.
i cant make a plan either.i go with what presents itself.so luck keeps a roof on my head.for now.at least ive ‘got’ land which i can take refuge in if my roof ever goes.
in quebec i spent the day walking around trying to follow clues.thought id get in old buildings,lovely reminders of mistakes,and we dont learn,do we..most were locked.
how can you have huge empty buildings locked with people sleeping outside of them?
how cruel do you get?spare 1 of them?ask neighbors to go there and leave suff they dont need for others to use?seeds for a garden maybe?is that such a strech?
you never know when you might need someones hand.
why cant we make room for the odd ones?call it sickness if you must.
i beleive doing so scares people away.
our brains,hearts and bodies work in similar and different ways.we must learn to use this.appreciate it.what would this world be witouth the wierd?ugly and boring, if you ask me.
on your deathbed will you be thinking about the stuff you couldve bought?or about the people you couldve helped smile a bit?i mean,whats greater than a smile,right?
all these brilliant people im sure we can work something out.
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“‘There but for the grace of God, I go ”
John Bradford
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I tossed and turned in my warm bed with my full tummy reflecting on this.
And I woke up to further snow on my steps and all over Winnipeg. I won’t even leave my dogs outside in this weather we’re having.
I have to say, the sentence “It takes a blow to understand the ramifications of one.” is circling my brain.
So true.
And so I’ll add.
“If I can stop one heart from breaking, I shall not live in vain; if I can ease one life the aching, or cool one pain, or help one fainting Robin unto his nest again, I shall not live in vain.”
Courtesy Emily Dickinson
as well as
“I am myself, and what is around me. And if I can not save it, it can not save me.”
I can’t remember who wrote that, but it illustrates to me at least, how the written and spoken word is definitely mightier than the sword. Only kindness can assist those less fortunate. Brutality and persecution only encourage the tangible alienation between people these days.
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:)
i also think we should help those who wish get out of the cities.
for health and happiness one must have basics.fresh air and such.i dont see how anyone can remain ’sane’ in cement.one needs beauty.as is a turtle.not pertty.as are the rich.
odd how easy it seems in my head.maybe its cause im not in the system.but if the system is hurting you why not make a new one?
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Last weekend we had a benefit for the homeless shelters in my hometown and it went over so well they are doing it again very soon. The money earned went to a great cause and things like this should be done all the time. Everyone had a blast but never for a moment did I forget that there were still people out there who needed a warm place to sleep and food and health care. Here I was, having a good time and they are wondering where they will be tomorrow. Geesh, in my need to want to help I feel so guilty now.
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I do not understand this Means - Ends World
where Beings are turned into ” Objects ”
because of their ” Outsides “…
their Circumstances….or their Beliefs….
Is it not true that…
The Moment we judge another Being
we reduce it into an Object and clearly
define our Separateness and Domination
In turn we rob them of their Freedom….
and make them feel….as though
they are not good enough
to be Part of us….the Universal Family
…..The Human Race….
Are we not most authentically Human
when we appreciate our Connectedness
with Everyone else…
when we embrace Others as Subjects
NOT Objects….
The harsh Reality is…
that each of us can at any Time become objectified
leaving us very vulnerable and alienated….
Ps: There’s always Something we can do
for those around us…
Always Something we can give…
Always Something we can share…
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a couple of times during the winter months, I set out on foot with sandwiches, baked potatoes and coffee for the folks in the DTES…I could use a hand(and the company) as my cohort from last year is unavailable. If anyone would like to join me, feel free to send me off an email and we can set up a time, etc.
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Different worlds indeed.
My daughter moved to Vancouver 18 months ago when she was 18.I was worried as any Dad would be but she assured me the people she was travelling with were savvy and knew all about Van.
She started work in a bar on “Hastings”….(The Savoy)…..I just thought it was a regular downtown street,she told me stories of the rough characters that she would serve in the bar ( at 9 am…..unheard of in Ont.) but said that basically they were all nice people that she dealt with.
She called me last week,on her way to work, a girl that she had served in the bar many times before,approached her on the street….beat the crap out of her,stole her purse and ran away.
Nobody stopped to help her (this was 8;45 am)…….this from the girl who would help anyone out at anytime
I just wonder if “normal” people have a valid point when they say they are scared to talk/look/care for some of the street people…..I know I will be extremely careful when I go to visit her
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Well as I read it before and so simply put:
*you must be the change you wish to see in the world*
That was from Ghandi.
I have to say that I have been a long time reader.. but I had to post something.
I grew up poor.. I was once one of those children who didnt get new clothes or food sometimes. It was a sad life I led..but my mother, a angel, did the best she could..We slept in cars, in a friends basement and garage. We had a crappy life for a while.. but she always had a smile to share. Now, by the grace of God, I have a small but simple apartment, a son, a job and food. And like Matthew suffer from Bi-polar disorder.. I have the more sever depression and take meds ( which I thank God that I can afford-living in Pennsylvania/Amercia-its a small miracle) it always kills me to see the less fortunate who have nothing and people just never look twice.. they were someones son, sister, daughter, brother, lover or baby at some time.. when did we stop caring about them and care more about the newest and latest tech?
We have a homeless man who comes to my work ( I work at a hotel) and he never has enough money for the rate of the room.. but I give him one anyways. He cleans up, we have a nice meal sent to him.. he gets one night of warmth and a hot shower a week.. and he never complains about his life.. he smiles and says to me *Sometimes we draw the short end of the stick* . I hope to never be in his place.. but I can always say that we try at times to make someones life much more simple and beautiful. A smile goes a long way.. a ear to listen and kind word is more then enough at times. These people never really wanted this for themselves.. they had dreams and wishes when they were younger. Be that as it is.. we can talk or we can act.. some choose to act. Thank God for people like Matthew.. thank God for people who take 5 mins to just listen…
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Quoting k@r@:
your daughter is lucky to have you. i find myself stuck in a rut.. i suffer from severe anxiety, possibly agoraphobia, but the guilt it would cause me to ask my parents for help is unbearable. i know we dont have the money, we definately dont have the money.. so i sit there waiting alone for things to fix themselves (which they obviously wont) and slowly slip deeper and deeper into depression. i guess everyone was wrong, money does buy you happiness…
i just wish i could skip ahead 20 years. when your 16, you cant do all that much to help yourself..
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margo_0, if you live in BC, and you are able go to the doctor and get a diagnosis, any psych pharmacutical is covered under ‘Plan G’,. This should be relatively easy for you to get, as you are a minor, and still in school….your doctor just needs to fill out a form. This also includes visits with a counselor, but I know there is a bit of a wait list for that. There are free services for those who need them, but they tend to be a bit hard to source out.
Best of luck!
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margo….
not only that, sometimes the schools can have some pull when it comes to having assessments done and getting an action plan.
My daughter suffers from anxiety disorder and depression and her school connected her to a youth worker at the Children’s Ministry. She receives counselling and has also been referred to a psychiatrist and it was all through the school system. They do have provisions for youth, as Phaedra stated, it’s just not always that obvious.
If you have a counsellor at school that you trust, approach them with this and see if they can help you.
Good luck. No kid your age should have to suffer or worry that they can’t “afford” help.
;)
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Quoting margo_0:
If you live in Vancouver, there is an anxiety disorders clinic at UBC hospital that provide efficacious treatment for anxiety related disorders. All you need is a doctors referral and the the treatment provide is covered by MSP.
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Thanks for contributing to Street Corner Matt. The newsletter is an amazing concept, I only have utmost respect for three of my friends who are actively involved with the creation of the magazine every month. I believe your contribution will appear in the December newsletter.
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In the city I live in this is a big problem. It angers me everytime I see less fortunate people begging for money on the street, or witnessing their metal illness. Someone needs to step in. Nobody should suffer this way. I don’t see how ignoring the problem is the answer. Our governments have put their focuses on the wrong areas. They speak of homeland security…. But our “homeland” is often forgotten….
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I work for Victorias Front Line Services for the homeless. I know it is not as bad as Eastside, but bad enough. Everyday my heart hurts for these people, no one wanted to go grow up and say, “i wanna starve, have no where to sleep, be cold, sell my body for drugs, money or a place to stay, and be looked down upon”. Every single person I have come across with in my line of work has touched me in someway. Whether its a simple “Hi Sweetie,”, Can I walk you to your car after shift, or, thanks Jen for that extra sandwich, you made my day. Its amazing how I can make someones day by handing out an extra ham and cheese sandwich. I think what we will tend to ignore is that we could be one of “them”. Many people from the the streets I have come to realize were once happily married, stable, a devoted parent and had some normality in there lives. Then came divorce, a child passes away, bankruptcy etc. Or, some of these people havent had a chance in hell from the start. Lots with FAS, (Fetal Alcohol Syndrome), and drug addicted parents. Should our system have stepped in then, maybe it could of saved someones life.
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I don’t know what to say after reading Matt’s wonderful piece. My compassion for people who suffer has become enormous in the past few years. Maybe its because i’ve gotten older, or maybe its because i’ve gone through a great deal myself. Often seeing/reading about suffering in the news, be it war, poverty, or otherwise, just overwhelms me with sadness that i have to leave what i’m doing & lay down or just go do something else more cheery like watch Seinfeld or something to take my mind of these horrible things.
I was raised Catholic. I’m not hugely religious, but i believe in God. I have often question my faith, as most do. Until recenly i often wondered that if God really existed, how can he allow all of this suffering to occur (like global poverty, atrocities in Nazi Germany, Rwanda, Darfur etc.)? Some ‘wise’ people’s answer to this is that in order to know happiness, we must also know suffering. But this answer didn’t fly with me. One can know happiness without starving to near-death or watch their parents be mutilated.
Recently i did figure out the answer on my own though. God lets suffering in the world to occur & doesn’t stop it on his own because we, humankind, have the means to stop it ourselves.
I wish more people, especially those well-off, would do more to stop all the preventable suffering that occurs in this world. But i have to say that my opinion & hope for mankind isn’t very high right now, given the way we have acted the past several centuries & beyond. These would be one of those moments where i have to go watch Seinfeld, no joke.
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for those who were wondering i live in toronto. and thank you for the advice and help you’ve offered. it actually brought a tear to my eye. complete strangers who’ve never even met me or spoke to me before took interest in what i had to say and tried to help me. a month ago i told a few friends and they didnt seem to take it very seriously at all, which definately didnt make me feel any better. im still not sure about what im going to do about my situation.. but thank you for taking the time to read what i wrote and speak to me about it. it did make me feel a bit better.
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I don’t think people are oblivious to any sort of social plight. They make themselves immune to it as a measure of self preservation, because we all have our crosses to bear.
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Updating my earlier story.
It’s 10:25 pm and black and cold outside. And my dogs lit afire barking at a knock at my door 5 minutes ago, even the one who rarely barks. I looked outside, peeping anxiously with my brother on the phone, and saw a familiar face.
The man from about a week ago was back, along with a thick blanket of snow. He was asking for food for his kids again in exchange for shoveling my walkway.
I myself am anxiously waiting on payday, drowning little by little by home insurance and mortgage and heating and water and bills and bills and bills. The food in my cupboards is all I have for another week.
But it is more than enough, far far more than enough when there is a 4 year old and a 6 year old hungry just a few houses down.
I loaded up a big bag with half of what I have. And yet it feels insufficient.
I feel like breaking down a little, I feel it coming, the tightness within my chest is gathering.
Fuck I need to share this, so I don’t crack.
I shook his hand, I told him to come back whenever he needs to.
His name is Jeff and he does whatever he needs to for his kids.
It sounds funny, but they may be some of the luckiest kids in the world.