Of all those that served in the military in my family, the one common trait shared by all of them is that they did not like to talk about their experiences. My Grandfather and Great Uncles went to lengths to avoid the topic, and as an inquisitive youngster I was sometimes scolded for my curiosity. At the time, of course, I couldn’t understand why, but as a grown man it’s something that I do.

Other members of my extended family have also served and seen combat, among them a cousin who was a United States Marine and a Great Uncle who served in Korea. In fact, my father came within an inch of becoming a member of the US Air Force in the 60’s after writing multiple aptitude tests which would have led to his serving as a member of a B-52 crew during Vietnam, most likely as a Navigations Officer. Thankfully, my Grandmother was adamantly opposed to the idea and he eventually declined the opportunity.

Death is in the eyes. When you spend time with a veteran that has witnessed the horrors of conflict that reality is ever present in their gaze. My Grandfather had it, my Great Uncles had it, and so do some of my friends, among them Patrick Pitt, one of this website’s contributing authors, a CF Artillery Captain that served twice in Afghanistan and, prior to that, throughout the Balkans. Daniel Regelburgge, a one-time matthewgood.org author, veteran of Iraq and NATO operations throughout the Balkans, and currently stationed at The Pentagon, does as well. Added to this list is also another site author, Roy El-Saghir, who was a member of the 82nd Airborne in the 1980’s and served in locations where US personnel weren’t supposed to be active, let alone involved in combat operations.

I mention this because a very real schism exists between public perception of military service and the reality and confusion faced by those that serve during wartime. The more politically complex the conflict, the greater that schism becomes. An example of this exists in the position of pro-war pundits that have, over the last seven years, completely skewed the line between military service and government policy. It has become entirely commonplace to suggest that if one does not support the political objectives of those that have taken us to war that those that have been sent to implement such policies are somehow being dishonoured and betrayed. Of course, nothing could be further from the truth, as it is entirely possible to support the welfare of our soldiers while adamantly disagreeing with the policies that have placed them in harms way.

The media has, of course, played a leading role in blurring such lines, leading to the diminishment of any negative information conveyed by veterans with regards to their experiences. After seven years of fighting, both in Iraq and Afghanistan, US veterans were finally gifted the opportunity to address Congress last Thursday about their experiences. And while they might not represent the totality of all those in uniform, their testimonies should not be overlooked nor marginalized…

“Antiwar veterans of the U.S. wars in Iraq and Afghanistan took their case to Capitol Hill Thursday, baring their souls with stories of killings of innocent civilians, torture, and wrongful detentions.

“On several occasions our convoys came upon bodies that had been lying on the road, sometimes for weeks,” said Marine Corps veteran Vincent Emanuele, who served in al-Qaim near the Syrian border in 2004 and 2005.

“When encountering these bodies standard procedure was to run over the corpses, sometimes even stopping and taking pictures, which was also standard practice when encountering the dead in Iraq,” he told the Congressional Progressive Caucus, which organized the hearing.

Emanuele also said that U.S. military personnel often took “pot shots” at cars passing by.

“Our rules of engagement stated that we should first fire warning shots into the ground in front of the car, then the engine block, and the windshield. That is if the car was even moving in the first place,” he said. “Many times cars that actually had pulled off to the side of the road were also shot at.”

Thursday’s hearing was an outgrowth of an event in Maryland earlier this year called “Winter Soldier: Iraq and Afghanistan - Eyewitness Accounts of the Occupations.” For four days in March, dozens of veterans of the two wars testified about atrocities they personally committed or witnessed while deployed overseas.

At the time, many of the veterans expressed a desire to take their case to Capitol Hill. Thursday they got their wish.

Congresswoman Lynn Woolsey (D-CA), the co-chair of the Congressional Progressive Caucus, addressed a panel of veterans at the start of the hearing.

“We now have an opportunity to hear not from the military’s top brass but directly from you,” she said, “the very soldiers who put your lives on the line to carry out this president’s failed policies.”

Nine veterans of the Iraq war told their stories before members of Congress and a packed gallery. One of the veterans had also served in Afghanistan. About 40 veterans were in the audience.

The veterans spoke about extremely lax rules of engagement handed down by commanding officers, which they said virtually guaranteed atrocities would be committed, and which in turn created a violent backlash among Iraqi people and a continued cycle of violence.

Former U.S. Army Capt. Luis Carlos Montalvan served directly under Gen. David Petraeus in 2005 and 2006.

“We have beaten our drum to try to raise the issue of the dereliction of duty committed by a number of generals who have been promoted and promoted again and continue to perpetuate the lies [that] paint a rosy picture of the situation in Iraq,” he said.

Montalvan said he personally witnessed U.S. military personnel carrying out waterboarding, the mock-drowning interrogation technique that has long been considered torture by U.S. courts.

Former Srgt. Adam Kokesh presented a picture of himself standing, smiling, in front of a dead Iraqi civilian that another marine had shot.

“This is a picture that I’m very ashamed of, having posed with this dead Iraqi as a trophy picture,” he said. “But what felt awkward to me at the time was not so much that I was taking the picture, but the fact that I had not killed this man and I was taking a trophy from somebody else’s kill.”

Kokesh said the person in the trophy photo was an innocent civilian whose car was accidentally “lit up” by marines.

Kokesh referenced similar photos that surfaced during and after the Vietnam war — some of which were presented at a “Winter Soldier” gathering organized by Vietnam veterans 37 years ago.

“At the first Winter Soldier investigation in 1971, one of the Vietnam veterans held up a similar photograph and said ‘Don’t ever let your government do this to you. Don’t ever let your government put you in a position where this attitude towards death and disregard for human life is acceptable or common.’ And we are still doing this to service members every day as long as these occupations continue,” he added.

Kokesh said his Marine Corps Civil Affairs team, including a major, was present when the trophy photo was taken. Numerous other marines also snapped their picture with the corpse, he said.

Members of Iraq Veterans Against the War hope this week’s hearing will spark an investigation by a full Congressional committee and speed the end of the wars.

Rep. Maxine Waters (D-CA) praised the veterans who spoke Thursday. “I want to thank you for having more courage than many members of Congress have — for coming here in defiance of what you have been instructed and taught to do,” she said. “They attempted to tell you that you should be satisfied by everything that you saw and everything that you did and everything you witnessed, but you’re not. I praise and honor you for that.”

The veterans’ testimony, however, may be overshadowed by an unrelated legislative maneuver that occurred just steps away from their hearing room Thursday: the House of Representatives defeated a $162.5 billion proposal to continue funding the wars in Iraq and Afghanistan.”

A few random bits to start with today prior to delving into the Petreaus-Crocker debacle.

First, congrats to my friend Claire Folwer who wrote her first blog entry in a year yesterday – for The Guardian.

Second, a rather shocking occurrence in which a girl was assaulted while it was videotaped…

Regarding The Recently Announced Calgary Date

I realize that some fans in Calgary might be disappointed that I’m not playing my own show but rather the Virgin Festival. Then again, the bands on the bill that day are more than worth the ticket price. The headliner is the Tragically Hip, then there’s me, then City And Colour, Stars, The New Pornographers, and Constantines. Hell, I’d pay admission the first night for The Flaming Lips alone.

Also, the single day admission of $75 dollars is taxes in, and a dollar of each ticket goes to the Virgin Unite program.

First, this website couldn’t run without the efforts of Dale Mugford. Second, his immense talents have, over the last year, made matthewgood.org more than I would have ever thought possible. But I don’t need to sit here and tell all of you how much work he puts into it or how talented he is – most of you are already well aware of that.

More than his web talents, Dale is an excellent human being from top to bottom and it has been an honour and a privilege to work with him and, more importantly, be able to come to count him as a dear friend.

Dale is one of the most selfless people that I have ever met. He is intelligent, possesses immense heart, a fantastic sense of humour, wisdom beyond his years, and an outlook on life that is utterly admirable.

On this, his birthday, I would like to say that I got him a gift. But, in truth, it’s hard to find someone a gift that is, themselves, such a daily gift to you and so many others.

In life we are lucky to come across someone like Dale, and when we do we realize that, despite the many shadows that hang suspended above us, people like him are lights that shine constant and undeterred. That is something that his mother, who has been battling a severe brain tumor for some time now, should never forget. That she provided that light, and that that accomplishment alone is enough to match any other.

It’s over. Having come to the conclusion that music is a dead end proposition, me and a few other musicians have decided to join the internet-porn revolution, which isn’t actually a revolution given that it’s been the foremost purpose of the internet for years.

As some of you are aware, I have broached this subject in the past, but after watching Knocked Up again last night, have come to the conclusion that a handful of musicians living together in a house attempting to come up with a unique web porn idea sounds a lot more fun than pretty much anything else I can think of.

I, of course, will play the role of the guy from Vancouver.

Sure, we’ll sit by the pool and play guitar and write songs, but we’ll just do it to impress chicks. None of that recording or touring crap.

Earlier today, Pete and I put our thinking caps on and had a bit of a brainstorming session. Of course, we didn’t come up with anything, but that’s to be expected. It’s only a matter of time before we do, and you can bet your bottom dollar that it will somehow involve clowns.

Everyone at matthewgood.org would like to congratulate Pete and Karen Siller on the arrival of their first child, Mekena Rachel Siller. Pete has been Matt’s lighting technician for years, and this happy news is shared by everyone involved with Matthew, from management to the rest of the crew.

Congratulations Mom and Dad!

Today is my best friend’s 40th birthday. I’ll not launch into a massive accounting of why Rod is my best friend, as many of the reasons are ones that remain between he and I alone, and that are, in truth, almost impossible to explain. We have, over the last two years, traveled the paths of loss and death and the limits of sanity together, and through it all have somehow been able to retain some semblance of humour. In many ways, when we are together, our ability to laugh as much as we do perplexes me sometimes given everything that’s transpired, but I’d not exchange it for anything.

There is no arguing that over the last several years our lives have both been irreparably changed. The upside, of course, is that through it all we’ve had each other to fall back on – even more, that one never has to ask the other to catch them, that it remains an unspoken rule between us.

I would, of course, like nothing more than to be able to grant Rod’s wish to have his father here today to share some cake, or to even stand on the back porch of his old house with him and share a cup of coffee and a cigarette and a few laughs - but that is not something that I am able to do. So I will say this instead…

In this life we often know many people. There are those that we believe we know but actually do not, and those we share ourselves with at a remove that will never be truly close to us. In many instances in life we are let down by those we believe to be trustworthy, that have given us the impression that their feelings towards us are unshakably sincere, and those that would use us for their own benefit without it troubling their conscience in the slightest. But sometimes in this life, if we are very lucky, we are gifted a bond with another person that is unquestionable in its strength, in its sincerity, and in its reliability. And though many might believe that they enjoy numerous relationships with a variety of people, the reality is that if you can seriously claim to have had one such true friendship in your time on this earth you are unbelievably lucky.

Personal politics, jealousy, and uncertainty are not elements that exist between those that are truly our friends. No matter how bad things might get, they are the ones that refuse to abandon us, even to their own peril, inconvenience, or disadvantage. That is what a true friend is, and therefore is not something that many can claim they actually possess. In my life I have been gifted such an unconditional friendship, and on this, his 40th birthday, though he doesn’t need to hear it from me, he remains one of the very few people in my life for which I would surrender my own to see him safe.

On behalf of myself, my brother and Chloe, and my parents, happy birthday buddy.

I wanted to quickly send out my thoughts and best wishes to my old neighbour Beth, better known to most of you as Bif Naked, who was recently diagnosed with breast cancer.

Beth’s a tough lady, and I’m sure that she’ll face this with the same fortitude that she has displayed throughout her career. Again, my very best wishes go out to her and her husband Ian during this trying time.

3:16 AM, raining again, maybe a gunshot in the distance, sirens a few blocks away. The sound of shopping-cart wheels click on the sidewalk below my window, stopping every twenty feet or so probably so that a garbage bin can be rummaged through. The ironic sound of a street cleaner hums below the din of the sirens, its brushes spinning against the concrete, new polish for the same old streets.

Life is death. She goes in for surgery tomorrow to see if they can remove it. If something is amiss she’ll have to get chemotherapy in the new-year. I can’t see her without that long, flowing hair framing her face. I’m not sure I’ll sleep tonight, even though I’ve been lying in bed trying for hours now. But life is death. As unique as we all might be, as uncommon as we all might be, in the end we all find ourselves in the ground, our ashes discarded at some place of sentimental significance, or simply lost or discarded because circumstances wouldn’t allow for such dignities. Live in a mansion, drive an expensive car, live in a shack in the woods, drive a rusted out pickup truck – everyone punches the same ticket. It doesn’t matter if you go to the gym seven days a week, consume the strictest of diets, down vitamins on a daily basis, or spend hours baking in some yoga studio – everyone goes. There’s nothing for it, only the reality that what you do in this life, the impression that you ultimately leave, is all that will remain. And even then, in most cases, it will be fleeting. That has been the way of the world since man straightened himself and took those first awkward, upright steps.

Will God be waiting for you? Will some imperious demon? Does what you fear in this life regarding the next limit your understanding of life itself? Even more, does it interfere with the universal acceptance of human finality?

My eyes opened, the lights were bright. I sucked in some air and fought the urge to laugh. I still don’t know why. I was pretty drugged up, nothing came out, but I still thought it amusing. Was that it, I thought? Like a film hyped to be something more than it actually is, that is how I found nothingness - all hype.

I used to have nightmares about getting hit by a car and being thrown across the pavement, my skin ripped away to the bone. But after that night I don’t dream about it anymore. In fact, the thought of it happening doesn’t bother me. Life is death, and that being the case; there are no secrets to it. It remains the one unalterable in a world of alterations, in a world gripped by the fear of the one thing that can never be avoided or overcome. How there is not comfort in that I don’t know.

Fear it if you must, and in doing so fear life. They are one in the same in the end. For to be born is to die, that’s the deal.

A long time ago, in a galaxy far, far away (otherwise known as Santa Monica), it was in the dining room at a friend’s house that I found out that the Matthew Good Band had won two Junos. I was, as many of you know, not at the awards show to accept them.

The year was 2000 and we were one of the hottest bands in the country at the time. It was a period of my life that was filled with anxiety, terrible stomach problems, and insomnia; all of it to do with the popularity that we had achieved and those aspects of it that I was not comfortable with. So instead of attending the awards I went and stayed with my friend Dina in Los Angeles, hoping to remove myself from the process and gain a little perspective.

I hadn’t spoken with Dina in years until today. We finally got a hold of each other after exchanging emails and it was fantastic to catch up with her. She was, of course, her usual amazing self, full of positive and supportive energy. We exchanged stories regarding what has transpired in our lives since we last spoke, talked about family, our dogs, the usual subjects that old friends cover when they’re catching up.

For those of you that are horror movie fans, you probably know Dina best as Detective Allison Kerry in the popular Saw movies. To be honest, I had no idea that she was even in them until one night during the recent tour when I walked into the front lounge of the bus and the crew was watching Saw II. I sat down to have a cigarette and, low and behold, there she was.

It’s an interesting feeling to see a friend of yours in a film. Given my profession, and how long I’ve been at it, you wouldn’t think that wouldn’t be the case, but it’s still strange nonetheless. To be honest, it’s no different than watching Dale Junior whipping around a racetrack at close to 200 mph on TV. It’s just bizarre to think that he’s in that car, even though he was obviously put on this planet to do it. I just always picture him standing around, shooting pool with the guys, and cracking jokes. Maybe, when I’m on stage, or my voice is coming out of speakers, it’s weird for them too.

Beyond that, i seem to have become addicted to Gene Krupa. No idea why, just am.

I would like to extend my congratulations to Jeremy Taggart and his wife who had a 7lbs, 11oz baby boy named Jack Henry Jones Taggart at one minute to nine on Halloween. All the best you three!